Picture this: It’s the middle of summer. You’re late for work. You decide to grab breakfast and eat it on the way to work. “Oatmeal sounds good,” you think. Never mind that it’s 167 degrees and 3000% humidity. An iced latte and an ice cream sandwich might make more sense considering the weather, but you’re trying to be healthy and you’re starving. While you’re waiting for your train you decide to pop open that paper container of hot paste and start chowing down. (Wait. Are those banana slices on top??? I think I'm going to hurl.) Incidentally, you’re not waiting for your train in some air conditioned waiting room (cue Fugazi here) or on an elevated open air platform with a gorgeous view and a balmy breeze. No, this is the SUBWAY platform, the furthest place you can get from fresh air, where the only view is of stagnant water, rats, and crumbling tiles, illuminated only by the sickening glow of fluorescent lights. Pleasantries be damned, that oatmeal is calling your name so in the hot, humid, foul subway station, you slurp it up while I stare at you in shock and horror, sweat dripping down my face, neck, back, and legs. Not only is it a bazilion degrees, but it smells like a urinal. I can't take it. I'm feeling faint. For the love of God, stop! There are better ways to get your oats, and not on a subway platform. Check out my recipe links below:
(And don't worry. Fall's not here quite yet, despite this rainy NYC day. It will be a million degrees again starting this weekend, so there's still time to complain about the heat before launching into 4 months of complaining about the cold.)
Olive Oil Granola
Oatmeal (Cookie) Pancakes
Peanut Butter Granola Bars
Extra Nutty Sour Cherry Olive Oil Granola
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1 comment:
I'm so grossed out by people who eat FOOD food in inappropriate places.
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